Have you ever met someone for the first time, only to be told you’ve met before? Whilst embarrassing, it proves that some people stand out and some people don’t.
Having a strong personality helps you gain trust of others and furnishes you with greater influence. While it’s true that people with strong personalities stand out, that doesn’t mean that having a strong personality requires you to be loud and bold. Luckily, a strong personality is like a fine wine and can be developed over time.
In this article, I will discuss what influences our personality and what a strong personality looks like. By using examples, I’ll share 5 things you can do to strengthen your personality.
Developing (and maintaining) happy relationships is a crucial step towards long-term happiness. But this is just the tip of the iceberg. This topic is covered in more detail in the biggest guide on how to be happy in the section Social Happiness.
What influences our personality?
Our personality plays a huge role in our lives. Right from birth, we are being molded by our environment and experiences. We develop certain traits through the way our parents raise us. We discover our likes and dislikes in school and through trialing different things.
Think of life as a series of building blocks. Every interaction we have with another builds our character. Every adventure or experience we have influences our personality. Our personality is forever developing.
In fact, we often hear of someone describing a particularly difficult period in life as “character building”.
For many years scientists debated whether our behavior was most influenced by our genes (nature) or our environment (nurture). Now, it is generally accepted that both nature and nurture play a part in who we are.
What is a strong personality?
Take a minute to think of someone who you consider to have a strong personality. What are they like? How do they come across? What do you notice most about them?
When I think of someone with a strong personality, I think of someone who is likable. I consider someone who is adaptable with their communication style. People with charisma and a pleasant energy spring to mind. And lastly, I link a strong personality with authenticity and knowledge.
Whilst someone with a strong personality is confident, they are not arrogant. They are optimistic, whilst being realistic. They take full responsibility for their actions and own their failings.
There are many traits of someone who has a strong personality. I appreciate not everyone with a strong personality will have the same traits. However, I am confident that everyone with a strong personality will have these 5 traits.
I have a strong personality, which is often commented on by friends or colleagues. Perhaps my strongest trait among the 5 above is my empathy. My weakest at the moment is my self-esteem. I’m working on this.
What about you? Do you have any of these traits? If not, maybe this is an area you can work on. We published an article on building self-confidence and one I find particularly useful on boosting your self-esteem.
Benefits of a strong personality
The benefits of having a strong personality impact our relationships, our personal lives, and our careers.
Due to their reliability and tenacity, people with strong personalities are often well respected by their boss and colleagues at work. This may lead to greater opportunities including promotion and pay increases. It also puts them in a strong position for job interviews as they usually perform well.
In general, people with strong personalities are sought after socially. Their peers find their energy and optimism contagious, and they like being around them. This makes them particularly popular.
Ultimately, people with a strong personality have the ability to build strong social connections.
5 tips to develop a strong personality
It seems having a strong personality is advantageous to a happy and successful life. The great news is that our personality is not static and we can take action to achieve a stronger personality.
Here are 5 ways you can strengthen your own personality.
1. Develop your non-verbal communication skills
Our communication skills include verbal, non-verbal, and written communication. How we interact with another person is key.
For the purpose of this article, we will focus on non-verbal communication. This includes:
- Facial expressions.
- Eye contact.
- Body language and posture.
Putting this list of non-verbal communication into play, let’s imagine you are attending a work event. At this event, you are introduced to a new person.
How can you show a strong personality? Consider these tips to facilitate your non-verbal communication.
- Try to allow your facial expression to support what you are saying. Show interest, surprise, enthusiasm, and engagement through your facial expression.
- Feel free to use your hands to express your conversation.
- Be sure to look this person in the eye when you speak with them, but don’t stare at them. Healthy eye contact shows self-confidence and also portrays a message of being interested in them.
- Stand tall, and point your body at the person you are engaging with.
- Be aware of the tone and volume of your voice. Does it match what you are saying?
- Don’t stand too close to them, there is such a thing as personal space!
- Make sure you have dressed appropriately for the occasion.
Non-verbal communication is exceptionally important. We convey a lot of our message without words.
In fact, scientists suggest that 70% – 93% of all communication is non-verbal. Very often we form an opinion on others before they have even spoken.
2. Increase your knowledge and skillset
I admire people who have a vast depth of knowledge on a particular subject.
Specifically, I love hearing them talk with passion and confidence. I’m in awe of people who are students of life and always appear to be learning something. Whether it is teaching themselves to play guitar or embarking upon a diploma in a topic of interest. These people have a real focus, determination, and zest. These people all have strong personalities!
When we embrace learning in later life we are both broadening our horizons and developing ourselves as a person. This promotes positive change and growth.
If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got.Henry Ford
I recently completed a diploma in sport massage therapy. The learning process has armed me with tools to help myself and my running, it has also added another string to my bow. I can earn money from this skill or simply use it to add to my growing expertise in the running, health and wellbeing world.
The more knowledgeable and skilled we are, the more competent we are.
3. Remain curious
When we are curious, we are open to learning new things and to positive change. Here are a few simple ways you can be more curious in your daily life:
- Try new things.
- Taste new foods.
- Watch different genres of films.
- Read a book on a topic you know nothing about.
- Learn about different cultures.
- Consider life from the perspective of another
- Break old routines and habits.
Our curiosity feeds into a growth mindset. Someone with a growth mindset is often both interesting to other people and interested in other people. This is a sign of someone with a strong personality.
4. Know your personal values
A person with a strong personality knows their personal values. Do you know yours?
This can be summed up as knowing what is important to us.
Among other things, I value:
- Thoughtful friendships.
- Living a cruelty-free life.
- Good conversation.
So I arrange my space to ensure I live in tune with these values. Whilst there is wriggle room, I have learned the hard way not to compromise too much on my core values. I know how important these values are to me.
Perhaps my commitment to my values is why others see me as someone with a strong sense of self.
5. Be authentic
When you know your values, don’t be ashamed to live by them.
It’s not just a case of knowing yourself. Being authentic requires you to show up as yourself. It allows us to recognize where we want to put our energy. Being authentic helps us decide on the journey of our life. It helps us consider what relationships and events we want to participate in.
When we focus on our authenticity we gain a clearer understanding of what we do and don’t want in life. As I travel further into my authenticity journey I feel more comfortable saying “no” to people and events which don’t chime with me.
This allows me to put my energy into the right places. Places where I feel strong and my personality shines.
Our personality is developed during our childhood through our experiences and the way we are raised. Luckily, there is still scope to change our personality and strengthen it. Having a strong personality comes with many benefits to your personal life and career. Here’s to being a more confident, capable, and stronger version of your current self.
Do you consider yourself to have a strong personality? What’s something that you struggle with personally? Or what’s your favorite tip of this article? I’d love to hear from you in the comments below!