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Hello! Who are you?
Hi, I’m Alenka, a Canadian who’s been living in Los Angeles for the past eight years. I’m currently the founder of SAHA Collective. My career began in software, with experience ranging from video game development to equipping Wi-Fi on planes. I also have a 70-pound, adorable four-year-old brindle mutt who is obsessed with anything she can chase.
I love amazing food and am the type of person who tries the one item on the menu that I’ve never heard of before. Until recently, I would have said that travel was one of my biggest passions, and while I still enjoy it, my world has turned upside down in the last two years. I’ve learned to cherish the small moments and appreciate things I previously ignored, and I absolutely love it.
Now, I consider myself to be happy, though I don’t think I would have said that even a year ago.
A significant part of my happiness today comes from finding my purpose. I’ve always admired people who seemed to know exactly what they wanted, while I had enjoyed my work but lacked the drive I saw in others. Recently, I discovered that drive within myself, and it has transformed how I approach each day.
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What is your struggle and when did it start?
In 2021, after years of overachieving and prioritizing my career above everything else in my life, I experienced burnout. It was so severe that I could barely get out of bed or feed myself anything more than a bag of chips. I had also ground my teeth so badly that I was experiencing shooting pain in my jaw. When I saw the dentist, she told me that the damage to my teeth was permanent. To this day I often have pain when eating or drinking very hot or cold items.
I had to quit my job, learn to be okay with resting, and make significant changes in my life. A year after leaving my job, I stepped off a curb and severely injured my ankle, to the point where I was told I couldn’t put any weight on it for three months.
I followed all the medical advice, but I kept reinjuring it every six weeks to three months. After repeating this cycle for seven months, I decided to research different forms of treatment on my own and eventually began to see improvements.
How did this struggle make you feel at your worst moments?
At my lowest point, I was so overwhelmed that I felt myself completely shut down emotionally. I couldn’t feel anything; even activities that used to make me happy felt like mere motions.
Those closest to me noticed that I wasn’t myself and could see what I was going through. I tried my best to hide my struggles from everyone I encountered, which only led to even greater exhaustion, as socializing drained every last ounce of my energy.
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Was there a moment when you started to turn things around?
About seven months into my recovery from my ankle injury, I began to understand how deeply intertwined my mental and physical health were. I realized that by ignoring what my body was telling me, I was more likely to reinjure myself.
For example, when I was tired and chose to push through instead of resting, I would often tweak my ankle. Similarly, if I was stressed or anxious and moved quickly without paying attention to where I was going, those were the moments when I would re-injure myself.
I found that 25% of the changes I needed to make involved my food and lifestyle, while 75% were related to my mental health and the small daily improvements I continuously worked on.
What steps did you take to overcome your struggle?
One of the biggest changes I went through was learning to be kinder in how I spoke to myself. I learned to give myself the same grace I had been giving to everyone around me my whole life. I began replacing “I should have” with a kinder and gentler “Since I’m not feeling up to it, what can I do to feel better?”
This shift meant making space for things I would have otherwise ignored. I started taking naps—lots of naps. For the first time in my life, I said no to trips I had been invited to. When I wasn’t feeling up to it, I would tell my friends instead of pushing myself to get out of the house.
I also learned to ask for what I needed and prioritize myself. For example, on Mother’s Day, I had a headache, and despite having guests over, I decided to lie down. It went against everything I had been taught, but it was exactly what I needed.
Have you shared any of this with people around you in real life?
I started sharing what I was going through with some of my closest friends. At first, it was terrifying; I expected all the judgment I had been placing on myself to come crashing down from my community.
Instead, the response was the exact opposite. Almost everyone I spoke with was incredibly kind and understanding. People stepped in to help in ways I would have never felt comfortable asking for, but their offers were a complete godsend.
Initially, I did not feel comfortable discussing my struggles in a professional setting, but I realized that, in the right context, it could be powerful. I began to notice similar patterns and symptoms in some of my coworkers, and by sharing my experience, I was able to help them see that they were not alone.
If you could give a single piece of advice to someone else that struggles, what would that be?
The biggest piece of advice I could give someone is to extend to yourself the same grace you offer to those around you. When we are kind to ourselves, even when we are not where we want to be, it makes going through hard times easier, even if things don’t improve immediately.
What have been the most influential books, podcasts, YouTube channels, or other resources for you?
When I was at my worst seeing a therapist felt incredibly overwhelming but I found that bite-sized advice experts on Instagram was all I could handle. The Holistic Psychologist was one of my favorites.
I recently listened to the audio version of the book Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle. It has changed how I approach stress and given me so many tools to implement in my day-to-day life, most importantly it reiterated that I was not alone.
Where can we go to learn more about you?
If you’d like to learn more about my story, here are some podcasts I’ve been a guest on. If you’d like to connect with me, you can find me on Instagram and TikTok.
💡 By the way: If you want to start feeling better and more productive, I’ve condensed the information of 100’s of our articles into a 10-step mental health cheat sheet here. 👇
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