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Hello! Who are you?
I’m Lisamarie and I live in St Johns, Florida. I am an independent life insurance agent and operations manager of our business.
I am married and we have 7 children together. Ages range from 34-19! We have two English bulldogs named Echo and Bella Bleu.
My passion in life is photography. I play with creating art on the side and on Sundays. I love capturing moments and feel I have the ability to freeze time!
I consider myself happy on every level of life. From a business standpoint, I get to help people daily. I listen to them, give them the tools to fly and help them make the best decisions for themselves and their loved ones. On a personal level, I feel very blessed and grateful for each new day.
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What is your struggle and when did it start?
After the birth of my last child in 2002, I faced significant medical challenges, including the removal of my gallbladder just 2 weeks after giving birth. This led to the development of Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS) This condition impacted every aspect of my life between work, health, and my personal well-being.
I lost a considerable amount of weight causing people to mistakenly believe I had cancer. At work, at that time, my frequent restroom breaks due to IBS drew attention and despite my efforts, I faced disciplinary actions and was eventually advised to retire after 18 years of service in a Level One Trauma Center Emergency Room.
For years, I struggled with IBS, which brought on sadness and depression. I sought help from various NYC doctors and specialists until I found one who helped me manage my condition and reclaim some normalcy in my life and around my children.
Raising four young children and battling a chronic illness with no cure was challenging for me.
On the outside, I looked OK. But I wasn’t and in some ways today still have flare-ups and struggles, the difference is, I now know how to maintain it, especially knowing this will be the rest of my life regardless!
How did this struggle make you feel at your worst moments?
My worst moments were the first 5 years of my diagnosis. I would not go anywhere far away. I didn’t want to travel. I would base my day on staying home and if I needed to go out, I would plan according to where the restrooms would be.
It was clear to my friends and family. There was nothing anyone could do for me.
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Was there a moment when you started to turn things around?
I realized that I was so withdrawn, I was missing out on my kids living life. It was affecting them. I was isolating myself and they were young at that time and they were suffering.
I remember that friends and family wanted to take a trip and rent a house in the Outer Banks with about 4 families and all of our kids. It was a 13-hour drive. I was terrified. My then-husband assured me that along the way, we could make stops whenever we needed to. In the house we rented, all of our friends gave me a room with a private bathroom!
I would say 50% of my mental health improvement was due to watching my kids feel bad for me. The other 50% was a result of my actions.
What steps did you take to overcome your struggle?
The step I took to overcome my struggle was seeing a therapist. Letting him know my struggles and how it was affecting me gave me strength to get out of the depression I was in.
He made me realize that acceptance is the biggest thing. I only learned how to move past my emotions after I accepted my situation for what it was. That was my biggest achievement.
Following up with my Gastrointestinal doctor on a regular basis was also very important, especially in the beginning stages. Complying with the medications given to me to help keep me maintained.
My best advice is to give yourself grace and allow yourself to feel all the emotions but to make sure you don’t stay in those emotions indefinitely. Especially when this is something you will live with for the rest of your life.
Lastly, adjusting your eating habits and accepting IBS is different for each person. What foods you can and cannot eat are based on the individual.
Have you shared any of this with people around you in real life?
Up until now, only my immediate family members and friends knew about my struggles.
Now that I have dealt with this for over 22 years, I find it easier to talk about it. In the beginning, I was embarrassed and didn’t want anyone to know anything.
If you could give a single piece of advice to someone else that struggles, what would that be?
A single piece of advice is to live your life no matter what! I wish I would have. I feel I lost so many years feeling sorry for myself.
What have been the most influential books, podcasts, YouTube channels, or other resources for you?
Most of what helped me is all available through Google searches. I’ve also been given useful information by my doctor.
What also helped was reading affirmations daily. This helped me stay positive.
With that said, one thing to remember is stress does not cause IBS, but will aggravate it. Having a positive mindset is key with this disease. Writing out affirmations and reading them is key to overcoming anything in life.
Where can we go to learn more about you?
You can connect with me on LinkedIn!
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